Dating is daunting in the best of situations. The Love of Your Life But, making the jump back into the dating pool after the loss of a spouse is unthinkable. Chances are that your marriage was long enough that dating seems completely foreign. The current dating landscape looks more like an alien planet than anything you did in the past. For some, you may have lost your spouse to an unexpected injury or accident which is even more jarring. For many, this means the very first time they would ever have to consider using online dating as a way to meet people. Then there is also the fact that for some, dating a widower or widow can seem strange.
Anxiety over trying online dating is only made worse by the media. Accounts of dating scams and people misrepresenting themselves flood the news.
Yes, there are definitely some people Lovinga out there that are up to no good. There always will be whether you meet online or out in the world “traditionally”. But, online dating is one of the best and most popular ways to find your next great love.
Here are some of the most common questions about finding love online after losing a spouse.
Am I ready? – The Love of Your Life
The first hurdle to jump with thinking about getting back into the dating pool is whether they are ready.
I’ve had widows/widowers who have come to me for online dating profile help years after losing their spouse. I’ve also had people come to me as little as 72 hours after laying a loved one to rest.
There is no set rule here. What feels right to you is the right answer for you. It doesn’t matter what other people tell you. You are the one who has to live your life, not them. With that said, here are a couple of things to consider:
Are you looking because you are ready for the next chapter of your life? Or are you looking because you want to fill a hole in your heart?
This is one of the biggest factors between success and failure when dating as a widow or widower. If you are looking for someone to enjoy life with, you are ready.
But, if your main motivation is that you are missing having that second person there… you might need a little more time to get into the right headspace. Remember that it might also be
Can you describe what you want without picturing your spouse?
I’ll admit, this question is a little unfair.
Everyone looks back at the great relationships of their lives to decide what they need for the next one.
But, if you can’t judge the worth of a potential new mate without comparing them to your lost love it’s not the right time. Once you can establish The Love of Your Life what you’re looking for and not comparing your date to your husband or wife, then you’re ready.
Which Dating Site is the best place to find someone open to dating a widower or widow?
There are over 3,000 dating sites and dating apps online, Lovinga.Com but how do you know which one is the right one for you?
There are not only a ton of sites, but some of them are much better than others. Depending on who you are and what you want in a relationship, the answer will be different.
Are you a widow or widower under 45? Your best bet is going to be with Match.com, eHarmony, POF, Bumble, or Christian Mingle.
Both Christian Mingle and eHarmony tend to lean towards a more Christian audience. If you are Jewish, Match is going to be your best choice.
While JDate is the largest dating site for Jews, The Love of Your Life it’s not a great one. You will generally have a much better experience on Match.
If you are over 50, the options for dating sites start to change a little bit. Bumble is not going to give you the chance to connect with people the way you’d generally want.
Match.com is the best option for you. Coming next would be eHarmony, POF, and Christian Mingle for potential success. You also have the option of joining dating sites for singles over the age of fifty. Two of the best are Ourtime.com and Silver singles.
Of the two, Our time has more people and it provides you with the ability to search for someone you’d like. Silver singles is a smaller site that is newer to the market. Like Harmony, they rely on a computer algorithm to pick matches for you.
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Which one you choose depends on a few different factors. Would you like to search through people yourself? Do you trust their algorithm to get it right on its own?
Before you consider joining a 50+ dating site, you should know that singles in their 50s- early 60s feel the people on the sites are “too old”. If you try one of them out and find that you agree, Match is going to be a much better online dating site for you. However, on a site with older people you are more likely to find people in the same situation as yourself and more open to dating a widower or widow.